IB and AP Chemistry Teaching Burnout and the Emptiness of a 400-Million-Won Stock Gain

I haven't written much here recently. It's been extremely difficult.

JJStudent & parent messagesEnglish translationStudent

Hello, teacher! I am the student from the Philippines who received chemistry tutoring during the winter break last year. My school has given me a predicted 7 for my IA, so I wanted to let you know! Thank you for working so hard to help me despite the tight deadline. I think I was able to get a good result thanks to you. I will let you know as soon as my final grade comes out!

Teacher

Wow! Congratulations! University decisions must be coming out too. Let me know if you get good news! Honestly, you did the hard work. Thank you!

Student

Thank you! I have been accepted to all the universities I applied to in the US—Michigan–Ann Arbor, Georgia Tech, Wisconsin–Madison and UIUC—and to the top universities in Canada. Now I am hoping for a good final result too. I will be in touch soon!

Teacher

Haha, that is amazing! Congratulations!

Student

Thank you!!

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Messages like these were what kept me going. I was really struggling.

Perfect IB Chemistry score—first in the school.

JJStudent & parent messagesEnglish translationStudent

I got a 7—86%! Around five or six points were deducted. They are checking again, though, so it might become a 6.

Student

I was just so happy, haha. I wanted to tell you first!

Teacher

Hahahaha! Your teacher! Oh, but you did well.

Student

For now, I got a good mark in our class.

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IB Chemistry: a student whose grade rose sharply.

At least these messages gave me strength. I was having a very hard time.

Sometimes, when students living nearby were emotionally shaken, I bought them a meal. Those simple moments of happiness helped me keep teaching.

Then something happened with Nasdaq stocks.

To put it simply, an investment that started at 60 million won grew to 400 million won.

The gain was so astonishing that I often thought I might not need to work anymore.

It felt like living in a virtual world, and I lost interest in ordinary life.

I watched Nasdaq charts late at night, even though my effort couldn't change them, and then taught without enough sleep.

I felt as though I was gradually losing my mind.

When a one-percent fall meant losing four million won and a one-percent rise meant gaining four million, it was honestly difficult to focus on lessons.

I disliked what I had become. I needed to regain my balance, but couldn't.

It sounds absurd, but the more I gained, the worse my physical condition became and the less I wanted to do anything—except stocks.

I wanted to quit everything, go somewhere in the mountains or countryside, and trade all day.

At that point, I was physically exhausted but mentally exhilarated beyond description. Then…

a sharp Nasdaq decline erased a large part of the gain.

And suddenly I came to my senses. Thankfully, it felt as though I had returned to reality.

I felt grateful for the people around me and recognized the value of my work again.

Ironically, after losing a large amount—it was my first loss trading Nasdaq stocks—I felt relieved and even better.

Then welcome university-acceptance news began arriving from students, and I gradually returned to ordinary life.

I had studied companies with the intensity of an exam candidate. When I wasn't teaching, I studied obsessively,

and during lessons I concentrated on teaching. I had been living at a relentless pace.

I wasn't in a normal state mentally or physically. After the large decline, my heart sometimes sank,

but that feeling eased with time too.

Now, thankfully, I think I can once again be a teacher focused on my main work.

Students who had entered university also contacted me often,

asking where to find solutions for their university textbooks, haha,

or how to solve a Chemistry exam question.

I hope every student I've taught does well.

The AP Chemistry exam is approaching, and many students also need to begin IB Chemistry.

I'll work hard again.

IB and AP Chemistry,

and IB and AP Physics.